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Where is the Random Thread of Randomness stuff that doesn't belong in other threads thread?

The machines have won. Cracked the screen on my phone. Bought the same identical phone. Showed up today. Figured all I'd have to do is move the SIM card. Nope. I've been fighting with this thing for I don't know how long. At this point I should just power down the phone because it is draining the battery faster than it can charge and run to the phone store to try to get them to set everything up.
 
Man -vs- Woman.

I'm generally glad to be a man. But I'm reading F. Scot Fitzgerald short stories. Offshore Pirate. Rags Martin-Jones & the Prince of Whales. And I gotta say, to win the heart of a fickle gal requires Barney Stinson level ploys, schemes, and gadgets, while if you're even a moderately attractive girl, being able to take off your underwear while you're at the dinner table without disturbing your clothes will win the game.
 
I think I finally sold off my driveway ornament, the first car I first bought on my own back in 1983. That thing saw some shit, multiple road trips, my ex crawling across the console to sit on my lap while I was driving nearly killing us both, packing people into the trunk to sneak them into no longer existent drive in theater, but it got to be too much for me to maintain. Had a high school kid stop by this evening saying he had the whole 500 bucks I was asking the last time he was over, he brought his dad with him to check it out, and his dad says "I like welding, and I have a trailer!"

So all fine and good. May she have a better second life.
 
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