The truth about florida

[Dr Dave]

[08:07AM] Cassie: I am not fully awake

[08:07AM] Dave: nobody in Florida ever is

 

[Cassie]

OMG YOU CAN'T TELL THE SECRETS OF FLORIDA FOR EVERYONE TO SEE!

 

[Dr Dave]

YES I CAN

 

[Cassie]

NOW YOU'VE DONE IT!

 

[Dr Dave]

O RLY?

 

[Cassie]

YA RLY!

 

[Dr Dave]

More truth about florida, it smells like burnt toast.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

ITS FLORIDA'S FAULT WE GOT BUSH FOR 8 YEARS BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

 

[Cassie]

I know.. gosh!

 

[Dr Dave]

LAME ASS STATE ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Fuddlemiff]

NOBODY'S MENTIONED WANG

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

VERA OR GARRETT???

 

[Dr Dave]

EVERYBODY WANG CHUNG TONIGHT!

 

[Ishcabittle]

Florida is like a huge, sunny, sandy, open-air prison. You can go anywhere, but you can't do anything.

 

[Dr Dave]

plus its full of old people who smell.

 

[Cassie]

Grrrr!

 

[Dr Dave]

well its true!

 

[Cassie]

If the stinky old people would only stop coming here to retire it would be perfect.

 

[Dr Dave]

It would still suck

 

[Cassie]

How do you know?

Things that don't suck about Florida:

When you are all freezing your asses off, I am wearing shorts.
Oranges!
Strawberries!
Shoot first law.
Alligator infested rivers.
Alligator infested golf courses (old fart population control)
Big trees.
Beaches.
Various amusement parks (some of them do not suck)
Sand hill cranes.
Rednecks. (they're good for a laugh)
Yankees. (they're good for a laugh)
Even in December teh grass is still green.
Global warming will give me beach front property eventually.

I can't think of any other good things at the moment, BUT I KNOW THERE ARE MORE OK?