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Royal Wedding RECAP

CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
In case you missed it here is a transcript of the BBC's commentary starting when the religion man asks if anyone objects to the marriage...
 
Harry: I OBJECT. SHE SHOULD BE MINE!

Wills turning his back on Harry trying to laugh it off...BY GAWD, SLEDGEHAMMER TO THE BACK OF WILLIAM'S HEAD! PRINCE HARRY HAS JUST LAID OUT HIS BROTHER! NOW HE'S APPROACHING KATE WITH THE SLEDGEHAMMER!
 
DON'T YOU HIT HER YOU SON OF A BITCH, YOU LEAVE THAT GIRL ALONE...he's lowering the sledgehammer. He's just staring at her...

WHAT'S THIS!? KATE'S LAUGHING! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY, IT WAS A SET-UP AL ALONG! KATE AND HARRY ARE MAKING OUT OVER WILLIAM'S BODY. SOMEBODY STOP THIS!

AND WHAT'S THIS...KATE'S SLIPPING A NAZI ARMBAND ON! HARRY THE NAZI, HARRY THE NAZI, HARRY THE NAZI! HE'S HIEL HITLERING RIGHT IN THE QUEEN'S FACE!

Wait a minute, Prince Charles is standing up! He's not going to take this...
 
And Prince Philip now getting invovled too! He won't let Harry get away with...wait a minute, STUNNER ON CHARLES BY PHILIP! GOOD GAWD, HE JUST LAID OUT HIS OWN SON! HARRY AND KATE NOW HUGGING PHILIP! THEY'RE ALL NAZIS TOGETHER! AND THEY'RE CIRCLING AROUND THE QUEEN! SOMEBODY'S GOT TO SAVE HER...
 
WAIT A MINUTE, THAT'S JOHN BARROWMAN's MUSIC! BARROWMAN'S HERE AND THE CROWD GOES WILD! JOHN BARROWMAN WITH RIGHT HANDS FOR HARRY, FOR PHILIP...AND ONE FOR KATE TOO! BARROWMAN STOMPING A MUDHOLE IN HARRY! THE TIDE HS TURNED..OH NOW. IT'S KATE "JORDAN" PRICE! SHE'S GOT A STEEL CHAIR! SHE JUST HIT BARROWMAN. DAMN HER! DAMN HER TO HELL! SHE'S HELPING PRINCE PHILIP UP...STUNNER ON JORDAN! NOT EVEN THAT OLD NAZI BASTARD WANTS ANYTHING TO DO WITH HER!
 
GOOD GAWD THEY'VE ALL TURNED INTO LEGO VERSIONS OF THEMSELVES. WHAT THE FUCK. I'M HAVING A HEART ATTACK! THIS IS THE END...OF THIS THREAD. BEST NOT REPLY TO IT OR BUMP IT EVER, REALLY! :clang:
 
Since I went to pictures to avoid the news I am going to assume this is all actually how it happened, and not question it.
 
AND Jack showed up and shouted KATE, WE HAVE TO GO BACK nearly ruining EVERYTHING.
 
Charlie wrote NOT PENNY'S BOAT on his hand and elbowed his way through the royal guards.. he placed his hand on Pippa's window, she gasped and tears filler her eyes as the guards beat Charlie to death.
 
They smeared themselves with royal jelly shouting at each other DONT LOOK AT ME YOU FUCK while breathing in balmoral air through a mask.
 
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