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Jonathan Ross premiering on BBC America this Friday

Eggs Mayonnaise

Eggs Mayonnaise

All In With The Nuts
Soon I will know what all the fuss is aboot. Friday's guests are Dustin Hoffman and Hugh Laurie, also Eric Cantona and The Gossip. How old is that show?

The Apprentice has been running for a while, but I just haven't found the time.

Torchwood: Children of Earth premieres July 20th!
 
Havent watched it in a while, last one I saw had Shatner on, but that was really funny.

Looking forward to Torchwood, which isnt a sentance I thought I would be saying
 
I think that was last week's show (Hugh Laurie was the only bit I saw.)

He doesn't actually rape anyone's grandaughter on tv though.
 
My only complaint, is the constant sexual innuendo. It takes him around a minute and change before we get to poo bum willy willy fart fart fanny. American's will be driven to distraction by his W's for R's, I would imagine, but he is very good at disarming the rich and famous. Shame he's an enormous cocksmith.
 
Speaking of TAKING IT UP THE ASS ON A NIGHTLY BASIS, here's Four Poofs And A Piano!
 
I am bored of his three jokes:

1. Will you be my new best friend famous person? Go on, please
2. I see in your latest film you are pictured holding an enormous stiff rod (snigger) and that you rub it (snigger) during key moments (sniggers holding hand to mouth)
3. *turns to camera / audience raises an eyebrow*

Even his radio show, which I used to be able to tolerate, is now becoming a over inflated stream of pomp and self interest.
 
Bum
 
I recommend turning the sound off during his opening monologue and at any point in the show where he mentions his pets or introduces some new toy he bought at Forbidden Planet.

I only watch it now if there's someone I like on it and usually set the tv to mute until they come on. I've had enough of all his dumb sex jokes.
 
That's what she said!
 
I like Jonathan Ross.

I must be the only one!
 
I LOVE HIM
 
Now, is he the type that always tells pervy sex jokes because he's a sex perv, or the type that always tells pervy sex jokes because he never gets any, and probably never will?
 
He's got a wife with huge tits.
 
And frequently claims he's extremely well hung.
 
That tells me he just gets to play with her tits before she locks him out.

ITS ON IN 30 MINUTES BUT THE METS GAME ISN'T OVER YET UH-OH!
 
Even as an Arsenal fan I have to admit that Eric Cantona is basically the coolest person who has ever lived in the history of TIME.
 
Mets lost, I'm not going to find anything funny anyway.

Ross is a twat, Hugh is a twat, everyone's a twat.

But I already thought Ross was kind of a twat anyway. I hate how he insists on looking like it's still 1978.
 
This is for Eggs if he watched the show. I watched it and during the Cantona interview he asked him about the press conference he gave in response to the infamous kung-fu kick he gave to the rival fan that racially abused him.

[youtube]OwXz4oC4h1c[/youtube]

He basically spoke complete nonsense about seagulls following a trawler for sardines and the press tried and obviously failed to decipher what the fuck he was talking about without realizing he was simply mocking them.


One of the greatest footballers of all time and a bonafide LEGEND.
 
He's talking to him right now, but a decent amount of it is sailing right past me.

BUT THANKS FOR TRYING, I LOVE U MAN!
 
"I'm not a man. I'm Cantona." has to be one of the best lines ever spoken. I really want to see the movie. I've always been a huge fan of the man and his incredible influence on the Premier League and the film does look great.

Just the fact that he is one of the best footballers of all time and yet he doesn't allow it to define him as a person and genuinely has no interest in promoting what he has done before and has instead filed it away under "projects complete" is inspirational.
 
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