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Would Star Wars have turned out differently if

Lilac

Lilac

Luci ain't got nothin' on me.
R2D2 was the gay one and C3PO was the 'normal' one?



R2 would have probably been shining his knob, that's for sure!
 
or if Greedo had been a human girl bounty hunter who would've seduced Han then stabbed him to death after sex?
 
No.
 
There was absolutely no need for a back story for Darth Vader. Luke should have died at the end of episode 5, and episode 6 should have ended with a phyrric victory for the Rebellion, with Chewie dying, sacrificing himself to save the crippled Han Solo.

An incest scene between Leia and Vader would have been appreciated, too.
 
The Emperor should have been portrayed as a withered sexual deviant who rogered himself with a lightsaber.
 
Three words:

Ewok

suicide

bombers
 
Padme should have faked her death and changed her name to "Mon Mothma".
 
Mon Mothma should have been Mon Mothra.
 
Ugnaughts should have been dressed as Gimps.
 
Jar-Jar should have been Boba Fett and saved the day at the end of 1,2 and 3 and only become evil due to his friendship with Ani.
 
Sounds more plausible than Padme falling in love with a teenager she met once years ago, and who just slaughtered a bunch of women and children.
 
What of Padme was Mon Mothma and she faked her death to Obi-Wan? She had the nursedroid induce death long enough for Obi-Wan to leave the room, and they killed a Padme decoy and put her in the funeral to avoid further suspicion. She didn't want to risk any Jedi knowing she still lived that way Vader wouldn't find out, and rape her with CYBORG PENIS.

She "died" the way Anakin "died" and chose a new life as MON MOTHMA: PLANNER, AND EXPLAINER OF STUFF.
 
If Dukat had gone to the Ewoks instead of Empok Nor, and converted them all to the Pah Wraiths before the Rebels got there...that would have been cool.
 
Does Artoo drag his arse around the carpet like some dogs do?
 
Yoda likes to snack on cats.
 
Vader should have pulled off his helmet to reveal that he is really Captain Kirk and not evil at all, only pretending so he could fool the Klingons who were about to launch an all out attack on the desert planet Arrakis thereby destroying the spice.
 
"DON'T YOU SEE? THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THE DOMINION WANTS!"
 
Is it just me, or did the Founder Leader have a really nice rack, and one of the cutest butts on Trek ever?
 
Laura's a bit husky.
 
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