Favourite heretical Jesus saying

[headvoid]

Well cover Jesus in petrol and strike a match!

Jesus in a G String!

Baste the good lord with hot fat!

 

[The Dork Lord]

Jesus doesn't love you; he's just trying to get in your pants

 

[The Dork Lord]

Jesus Eats Me.

 

[The Dork Lord]

Jesus Touches My Naughty Bits.

 

[curiousa2z]

I like Sweet Zombie Jesus on a Stick.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Jesus Tap Dancing Christ

and

Sweet Buttery Jesus

 

[CaptainWacky]

I've always liked "Christ on a bike!"

"Sweet Jesus on a Cross!"

"Jesus wanked on the Cross!" is one I just made up.

 

[Ishcabittle]

Jesus built my hotrod.

 

[whisky]

AK47, its what Jesus would have used.

 

[headvoid]

Well Jesus fuck a duck!

 

[CaptainWacky]

All the variations of "lies make baby Jesus cry" (originally from The Simpsons.) For example: this thread makes baby Jesus cry. WITH LAUGHTER!!!

 

[Cassie]

I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.

 

[Cassie]

Dear little baby Jesus, who's sittin' in his crib watchin the Baby Einstein videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors. I would like to thank you for bringin' me and my moma together, and also that my kids no longer sound like retarded gang-bangers.


My nephew made me watch Talladega Nights again.

 

[curiousa2z]

^Jesus!

 

[curiousa2z]

my Gran would get mad when I'd say "Jesus Murphy!"
hahaha! that of course made me say it more....
good times!

 

[A_Real_Prick666]

What Would Jesus Do For A Klondike Bar?

 

[FBI parte due]

Bob Ross is the second coming.

 

[The Dork Lord]

LET JESUS FUCK YOU!

 

[CaptainWacky]

Jesus fucks the little children.

 

[Cassie]

Jesus on the cross-cicle